First of all, there's hockey. It's the most obvious example of Canadians being obsessed with an ice-related activity. Hockey to a Canadian is a sacred tradition. It's a religion. It's life. Without hockey there are no Canadians, only Americans that have wandered too far north.
But the Canadian love of ice does not stop there. No, it continues on to figure skating. While less blatant, Canadians treat figure skating with incredibly high esteem as well. The country's citizens were close to declaring war when controversy initially cost a pair of Canadians an Olympic gold medal in pairs figure skating.
But those interests generally make sense. Hockey and figure skating are popular around the world, not just in Canada.
However, there is one ice sport that defines Canada's bizarre obsession: curling.
While the game was not invented in Canada, it is a definite part of Canadian culture.
Though interesting and difficult to play, the sport of curling looks absolutely insane to outsiders.
Teams take turns throwing rocks down a sheet of ice trying to place their rocks closer to a goal than their opponent's. At first it sounds like a completely normal game, right? Wrong. In order to direct the rocks to the goal two team members shuffle slightly in front of the rock, sweeping the ice in front of it with brooms. Yes, brooms.
Household cleaning supplies aside, the game gets weirder.
In order to assist the sweepers in positioning the rock close to the goal, other members of the team scream instructions at them. That isn't an exaggeration. They scream. Loud. What you are left with is one person (having thrown the rock) sprawled on the ice, screaming uncontrollably as two other people awkwardly shuffle along, frantically sweeping a path across the ice. It looks just about as crazy as it sounds.
But Canadians love it.
While curling is played around the world, it has a huge following in Canada. There's just something about brooms and screaming that gets Canadians excited.
When trying to spot a prospective Canadian, mention curling. If the person mumbles something about how their hairstylist doesn't have time to fit them in for a good appointment, carry on with your day. That person isn't from Canada. However, if they immediately start sweeping and/or yelling, you've found yourself a Canadian. Congratulations.
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